Trauma, damaging as it is, may also provide the ground for opening the mind. When the body is in pain and shock, the thinking mind can quiet and open to a vivid experience of vastness. A moment of suffering can free the mind to realize the truths of human existence: our interconnectedness and our impermanence.

Grace Schireson, Naked in the Zendo: Stories of Uptight Zen, Wild-Ass Zen, and Enlightenment Wherever You Are

This is perhaps the extremity of what I was trying to write about yesterday: the open acceptance of whatever is simply as it is, without wishing it otherwise, trying to change it or make it stop.

In the course of a long and somewhat varied life I have encountered both physical and emotional trauma – though not, I’m relieved to say, both at the same time – and what Roshi Grace writes here does seem to be true.

I remember clearly the accident that ended my farming career; at the very time that I was severely injured, a vast and spacious freshness opened around me: a sense of limitless possibility opened out in the exact instant that all choice was taken from me and I became no longer a grown man in my prime, but what they call “a victim”. In that moment I was free. In some respects at least, that freedom has never left me.

So what is it that happens at times like these? I think the essence of it is probably that the thinking mind, the little mind that comments, describes, evaluates from dawn to dusk on a normal day, is suddenly, decisively, stilled. Something has happened that is too big for it to even pretend to comprehend or to control, and it simply drops out. In that precise instant, the light and the vastness of the open ground suddenly flood in, overwhelming all else, and in the midst of disaster there is perfect peace.

Of course such extremes of practice cannot, must not, be repeated. (Perhaps, though, one may glimpse something of the addictiveness for some people of taking certain kinds of risk?) But such a moment is unforgettable; taken in the context of an established practice, maybe it can provide, what? A yardstick? A seamark, perhaps. Something to steer by; no more than that, and yet, vitally, that. Now, at least, one knows that it is there, that it is possible to be there oneself. That then is the gift, the treasure the dragon was hiding; and it is beyond price.